Click Me

 
James is right about Howard Dean. Not only CAN he win, I believe he's the ONLY Democrat who has any hope of unseating King George (barring some major screw up by the Bush brigade). None of the other guys have the sort of screwed-up charisma that Bill Clinton brought to the 1992 campaign. Dean's not the same kind of charming frat boy that Clinton was, but he IS the only one that doesn't put you to sleep before he even opens his mouth. John Kerry and Dick Gephardt both carry themselves with the same sort of "it's my time" demeanor that completely failed to get either Bob Dole or Al Gore elected. And the entire "Democratic establishment" roster of candidates usually come off as campaigning FOR Bush - "We're 100% behind the president on this war thing, but, um, doesn't the economy suck? It sucks, right? Vote for me!" Dean's a crackpot, of course, but is one of those "He sounds so crazy he just might be right" kinds of crackpots, unlike the more typical "He sounds so crazy he just might be crazy" crackpots, like Al Sharpton.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 9:50 PM

 
Well, Fingers and his friend Eric have thrown down the gauntlet, distracting me from all else until I responded. Fred knows my weakness for making lists of unimportant things. This month's list? 100 Best Movies Of All Time. Not a particularly original category, but still one I obsess over. I don't really like titles like "best" and "of all time", however, so I really just made a list of "100 Movies I Really Like Right Now", in no particular order. Here's the top 10. I've got my complete list (along with Eric & Fingers' lists) over at my personal weblog so as not to distract from more important Monkey Business.

RobbL's Movie List

The top 10, in no particular order:

1. Brazil
2. Chinatown
3. Ed Wood
4. The Godfather
5. The Big Lebowski
6. Blade Runner
7. Almost Famous
8. Goodfellas
9. Rushmore
10.This Is Spinal Tap

I challenge all Monkeys and Monkey readers to submit your choices! (see e-mail address in upper left corner)

posted by Monkey RobbL at 12:20 PM

 
Thank heaven there's ONE presidential candidate who'll roll up his sleeves and do something when a REAL crisis occurs.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 11:46 AM

 
Is that Burt Reynolds? Looks more like Magnum-era Tom Selleck to me. I didn't watch the show, but didn't he tromp around Hawaii wearing a Dodgers cap?
posted by Monkey RobbL at 8:27 AM

 
I'm off to Burning Man. Back after Labor Day...but I'm sure my co-monkeys will be blogging early and often.
posted by David at 5:03 PM

 
Dry State Update - Janet vs. Everybody

Anecdotal evidence alert!

Well, not to belittle Brad's "kill" last night, but things might finally be loosening up around here. I've been out of town most of the week, but I just got back in town today. I went to grab a little lunch down at I-10 & Chandler Boulevard, and the Chevron station there had plenty of gas, all three grades, and scarcely a person taking advantage. I don't know if I just lucked out and caught the "window" after the tanker truck left but before everyone else realized this station had gas, but I wasn't about to ask questions - with no guilt whatsoever I drove up and "topped off" my tank that was still 2/3 full.

After reading Brad's post, I feel a little like the one guy who blew off hunting in favor of a trip to the butcher shop. I feel no sense of victory or satisfaction, but my belly is full.

"Burp!"

posted by Monkey RobbL at 1:42 PM

 
The Made-for-T(ee)V(ee) Election

If you'd like a break from all of the serious political discourse about Gray, Arnold, and the other governor wannabes, stroll on over to TeeVee.org for Philip Michaels's "Station Break" about the affect California Election Law has on television programming. Or, for fans of Drudge & The Smoking Gun who can't get enough of that typewriter font, you can read the exact same article on Phil's weblog.

Current Song: "Kill Your Television" from the album God Fodder by Ned's Atomic Dustbin

Current Drink: Diet Coke from the fountain at Carl's Jr.

posted by Monkey RobbL at 2:07 PM

 
While I agree with Powerline's (via Brad's link) assertion that it is ridiculous to pretend that Judeo-Christian morality didn't play an essential role in our country's founding and the presuppositions of many of the founding fathers, I think most of the conservative discourse on last year's "taking God out of the pledge" debacle misses a much more important point. To quote Lawrence O'Donnell on the June 28, 2002 edition of The McLaughlin Group:

And it's funny to see this country getting all hopped up over a hundred-year-old poem written by a socialist, who would -- and when you look at the Declaration of Independence, written by Thomas Jefferson, you can tell not one of those signatories would want to believe that we now have a loyalty oath in this country that we must recite, by law, in public schools.

O'Donnell is dead right. It is obscene that we ask, we COMMAND, children to recite a loyalty oath before they are even mature enough to understand the promise they are making. To underscore the silliness of the furor, McLaughlin points out that, "The Pledge of Allegiance dates to 1892, but the words 'one nation, under God' were not added until 1954."

Further, everyone seems to avoid an even larger point about reciting ANYTHING in a public school: The government, particularly the federal government, has NO DAMN BUSINESS running education in this country. Education is inherently moral, inherently religious. You are training minds to think a certain way, and that kind of control should not be left in the hands of the state, particularly a state founded on Enlightenment principles of individual liberty. Cases like this only underscore the problem of having the government meddle in territory that is not theirs to manage.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 12:23 PM

 
Don't swim with seals. Bad things happen.
posted by David at 12:42 AM

 
A headline at OpinionJournal, Frank Lloyd Wright may yet "build" Baghdad, struck a memory: before I went to California and went to college with co-monkey Ben, I went to Arizona State University with co-monkey R.B., and across from our dorm was Gammage Auditorium. I remembered hearing that Frank Lloyd Wright had "designed it for some sheik or something but it never got built." The OpinionJournal article doesn't mention this fact, Wright did use his Baghdad ideas, albeit in a different desert with asphalt instead of rivers running under its sweeping walkways.

There's some good discussion of all of this, with pictures, here.
posted by David at 12:19 AM

 
Start time: 8:23 p.m., Pacific Daylight Time

Tonight, sadly, I blog from Purgatory. For those of you that enjoyed my light-hearted evening in Paradise, just move on to the next entry. There's nothing to see here.

Current Drink: well martini, straight up with an extra olive
Current Song: "Bad To The Bone" by George Thorogood and the Destroyers

You see, I'm not in glorious San Francisco, drinking and dining at the magnificent Fiddler's Green. No, today I am eating sub-par ribs at the Tony Roma's across the street from Disneyland, the so-called "Happiest Place on Earth." Well, I will confess that I hold a soft place in my heart for the Magic Kingdom, but today it merely mocks me. This week is the last "blackout week" for the Southern California Annual Pass, and I can hear the Matterhorn mocking me as I shuffle by the park entrance from my hotel, past the Most Expensive IHOP On Earth, to Tony Roma's. It laughs, and I weep.

Current Song: "Venus" by Bananarama

The music is bad. Not HORRIBLE, merely bad. Pop and disco from the 70's, 80's, and 90's. The reason I say it is not horrible has to do with my recent realization that this "smooth jazz" that Clear Channel has foisted upon every major radio market is truly the Worst Music Ever. I never cared for it much, but when I was forced to listen to it for 45 minutes straight as my father drove me home from a baseball game, I grew to loathe it. The muscles in my neck tightened, my blood vessels expanding at the base of my skull. To make matters worse, the Diamondbacks lost the game to the freaking New York Mets.

Music like this is one of several reasons I describe this place as Purgatory. It's not exactly Hell. It doesn't feel like eternal punishment. But it DOES make me feel like my sins are being purged by way of annoying music. I didn't get the benefit of a Catholic prep school education like Brad did, but I'm pretty sure that's the kind of stuff Dante described in volume two of the Divine Comedy.

Current Drink: Martini #2
Current Song: "You Can Call Me Al" by Paul Simon

I didn't set out to have dinner at Tony Roma's, especially this one. Back in Arizona, you can usually count on TR's to give you a pretty decent plate of unclean meat. But this one is the "I'm across the street from Disneyland so I don't have to try" Tony Roma's. My ribs were dry, the selection of whisk(e)y, wine, and beer were all unsatisfactory, and the service is "phoned in". Knowing this, I asked the front desk at my hotel if there was any place other than TR's where I could get a nice dinner. When they suggested Mimi's Cafe, I knew I was not going to get anywhere asking this crew. So I grabbed my briefcase and trudged past the snickering Matterhorn on my way to "Downtown Disney", the outdoor mall wedged between Disneyland and Disney's California Adventure. I should have known better.

Virtually all of the restaurants in DD were owned by the same company, and they all offered the same kind of over-priced watered-down faux-sophisticated cuisine you can expect from a Disney theme park. Ever had dinner at the Blue Bayou, inside the Pirates of the Caribbean ride? That's what I'm talking about. There was a House of Blues and an ESPN Zone. I considered entering the latter and seeing if they were airing tonight's Diamondbacks game, but I really wanted a decent meal, even if I had to find out later about our crushing defeat [we actually won, 6-1, but I didn't know that at the time]. While reviewing the DD directory, I noticed a restaurant or two inside the Grand Californian resort that looked appealing, so I wandered inside. No such luck. The one restaurant that looked like it might have something good was outrageously priced, and there was no way I was going to pay $70+ for DisneyFood.

With my tail between my legs, I walked back to the Rib-o-rama.

Current Song: "Don't Worry, Be Happy" by Bobby McFerrin
Current Meal: Some kind of "rib sampler" with four different types of ribs, baked potato, and corn on the cob

You know, for having just consumed two martinis, I'm feeling pretty much stone sober. That's not what I was shooting for, I'll tell ya. Numb would be a better description of the target. I spent about two hours floating in my pool Saturday waging war with my pool sweep, which stubbornly refused to enter the shallow end of the pool and take care of business. At the end of two hours, I left the pool defeated, with an outrageous sunburn to remind me of the pool sweep's superior skill in battle. I would like my expensive beverages to at least make the pain of my sunburn go away.

By the way, I hate my pool. This is the first pool I've ever owned, and I really don't like it. Oh, I enjoyed it for the first 6-8 weeks or so. But then came the cleaning. The cleaning and the chemicals and the cracked plaster and the motherf--ing pool sweep that won't visit the shallow end. Growing up, my sister and I always wanted a pool, but my father stubbornly refused. "Too much work, and you'll never use it." I'm sorry, Dad. I'm sorry I ever doubted you. I take back every stupid thing I said as a teenager.

Current Song: "She's Got the Look" by Roxxette
Current Drink: Samuel Adams Summer Ale

I should have had another martini, but I bought a beer so I could sip it and have time to blog. My ribs are long gone. Mediocre, but filling, and I was quite hungry after my journey through the Crappiest Mall on Earth. Part of my problem is that I don't have a car - I made a critical error in estimating the distance between my hotel and the customer I'm servicing during this trip, and had our local sales guy pick me up from "the three named airport" (is it John Wayne? Santa Ana? Orange County? it's a mystery), so now I don't have a vehicle. If I did, I could have driven away from tourist-ville and found either a good restaurant or at least a place where I could buy a good bottle of wine to take back to my hotel room.

Anyway, I'm sipping the beer, blogging, and hoping that in a few minutes I'll have room for dessert, and that dessert will be better than dinner. Crazy. Maybe the martinis are having an effect after all.

Current Song: "Addicted to Love" by Robert Palmer

Okay, about the whole ROPMA thing, I know it's frequently used in conjunction with some sort of jingoistic ranting, but there's really something to the phrase. I mean, if Christians have to take the rap for the Crusades and the Inquisition, hundreds of years after the fact when none of the perpetrators are alive anymore, shouldn't SOMEONE have to own up to the fact that it doesn't MATTER if your scriptures aren't in sync with the behavior in question. What matters is that the clergy are actively encouraging murder and mayhem in the name of God. And the clergy ARE the religion - there's no Martin Luther going around proclaiming the doctrine of "Sola Korana". What the mullahs say, goes.

Maybe I'm being overly simplistic - I'm not trying to say it's a universal thing, any more than I would accept the assertion that all Christians are intolerant murdering bigots. But it DOES seem like the active religious leadership are highly complicit in the current misdeeds. Where is the opposition from within the active clergy? Pat Robertson may be a bonehead, but there are 100 other Christian leaders saying he's a bonehead. There are 1,000 Christian clergymen who will stand up and tell you that the Crusades and the Inquisition were horrible abuses of power by a corrupt church that had lost its way.

I probably shouldn't be thinking out loud, but these demons have been nagging me, and here in Purgatory the nagging is particularly loud. Are Americans really so stupid that if our President doesn't get on the television and tell them half-truths about Islam, they'll go on a killing spree, senselessly murdering any person with a funny name? On second thought, maybe so.

Current Song: "Boogie Oogie Oogie" by ??? [holy cow, who programs this stuff?]
Current Drink: Bailey's and coffee with too much whipped cream

Hey, a guy deserves a sissy drink after an ad-hoc rant like that. This one has a maraschino cherry on top. I hate maraschino cherries, but I can tie the stem into a knot with my tongue. I learned how reading an interview with Lara Flynn Boyle in Rolling Stone back when "Twin Peaks" was on the air. Sherilynn Fenn (sp?) actually did the tongue thing on the show, but confessed in her own interview that she didn't know how to do the trick, but LFB could do it. Anyway, it's not really a marketable skill unless you're a hustler...

I ordered the "Skillet Brownie Sundae". Hopefully it won't be as dry as the ribs.

Current Song: "I Touch Myself" by Divinyls

Oh, I almost forgot to tell you my "edumacated waitress" story. There's a restaurant in the Valley called "Uncle Sam's", that serves American-Italian food. The food's good, but they serve Pepsi products, so I pretty much "have" to order a beer when I eat there. One afternoon, I was meeting one of my business partners for some wings and a beer, and the waitress approached the table to take my drink order. We were going to be there for a couple of hours, but Dave wasn't going to be drinking, so I didn't want to order a whole pitcher for myself. I asked the waitress if I could have a pint of Fat Tire, one of my preferred malt beverages. She informed me that they didn't have pints, only glasses, 1/2 pitchers, and pitchers.

"What sizes are your glasses?" I asked.

"Sixteen ounces," she replied.

"I'll just have one of those, then," I replied. Somewhat gracious of me, I thought.

Current Song: "Footloose" by Kenny Loggins
Current Drink: coffee, with four little half & half cups

Ugh. I've got to get out of here. "Check, please!"

(If only Dante had considered this route of escape)
posted by Monkey RobbL at 10:54 PM

 
Proud Papa Update

I bought the 4-disc DVD box set of the first season (26 episodes) of Rocky & Bullwinkle & Friends, and my three and five year old daughters LOVE it. Especially "Fractured Fairy Tales". They watched seven straight episodes (the first disc) while lounging with me on the couch Sunday. I'll bet our ridiculous governor's children don't have such exceptional taste. That is, if she has any offspring that she hasn't eaten.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 3:53 PM

 
R.B.'s mention of Mojo Nixon reminded me:
Elvis Needs Boats.

Yes. Yes he does.
posted by David at 9:50 PM

 
Sunken treasure.

< /piratevoice >Arrrr!< /piratevoice >
posted by David at 7:43 PM

 
Usually, my daughter spends her time wreaking havoc on her bedroom, the playroom and, well, pretty much the whole house. And the yard. It appears, however, that she has decided that the Casa de RobbL is just not enough territory to destroy, and has aimed her wrath south of the border.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 5:47 PM

 
Since I'm James Taranto's official biographer, I realize I've been negligent in not posting the link to his site.
posted by David at 9:50 PM

 
I can't wait to get Mark Steyn's reaction to the Canadian government's inept handling of the Great Blackout of Aught-Three.
posted by David at 9:47 PM

 
The article R.B. linked to below included the wonderful British slang word "chuffed," which set me off looking for its orgins (answer: unknown, 17th Century). It also led me to this great dictionary, which I'm quite chuffed to have found.

Now I'm off to get some kip.
posted by David at 3:20 AM

 
The man most responsible for destroying GOP domination of California was Pete Wilson. And now Arnold Schwarzenegger is making him "the political face" of his campaign.

Time for another look at McClintock...
posted by David at 8:15 PM

 
Sweet, beautiful central government

As y'all know, I have strong leanings in the Libertarian/States-Rights/Just-Leave-Me-Alone direction politically, but I have to admit, when I read this article, I thought to myself, "Living in a police state ain't so bad after all."
posted by Monkey RobbL at 1:11 PM

 
I'm afraid only "Kentucky Bourbon" has to come from Kentucky. According to the Malt Advocate, anyone can make Bourbon if they are willing to live up to the strict legal requirements:

According to the feds, "straight whiskey" must be made from a mash of grain, distilled at no higher than 80% alcohol, and aged in new charred oak barrels for a minimum of two years. It must be at least 40% alcohol when it is bottled. To earn the name "bourbon" the whiskey must be made from a mash of at least 51% corn and meet the requirements for straight whiskey.

Tennessee Whiskey is legally the same as bourbon, except it must be made in Tennessee. Bourbon, contrary to popular belief, does not have to be made in Kentucky unless the producer wants to say Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey on the label.

Someone should do a doctoral dissertation on why alcohol has so many rules around specific definitions. I'm telling you, if you defend your thesis with a gin tasting, you'll be home free...
posted by David at 11:43 PM

 
Brad has now taken two swipes at my link to Sobran's article that discusses the New York Times, so I must retort:

I would like to point out, to start, that the reason I posted the link was because of the nomocracy/teleocracy discussion, not the "defense" of the Times, but I will respond to Brad's comments, nonetheless. The key quote in Sobran's discussion of the Times is the second paragraph:

Setting aside its editorial and commentary pages, I don’t share the general conservative view that the New York Times is the American version of the old Soviet daily Pravda. When I want full and accurate coverage of a story, I usually rely on the Times. Any liberal bias it displays is more than compensated for by its dedication to the impartial reporting of facts. I’m particularly grateful for its practice of giving full texts of (or at least long excerpts from) important presidential speeches and Supreme Court opinions.

Now, while it's true that TimesWatch has a wealth of fodder, a cursory browse through the homepage shows that the vast majority of the articles TW criticizes are opinion pieces, not "news", per se. And I'll also make a side reference Ben's entry about the myth of objectivity, anyway.

The point is, conservatives (particularly talk show hosts, popular columnists, and active politicians) tend to be "vague" about defining the Times as "liberal" - they suggest that the straight news stories are dripping with left-leaning propaganda, and Sobran's point is that it's just not true, or at least not true in any way that distinguishes the Lady from any other large paper.

So, in Brad's latest post on the subject, he links to a PowerLine post describing failure of the Times to properly check its source, which resulted in the reporting of a fabricated event. This is supposedly evidence that conservatives are not vague in their accusations of bias at the Times. But the argument fails in three ways. First, the event is evidence of ineptitude, not bias. Hindrocket's speculation in the penultimate paragraph that they "couldn't wait" to report another combat death is unsubstantiated. Second, you have to assume that only "liberal bias" would motivate them to report the increasing body count, as if there are no Republicans who oppose the war. Finally, and most importantly to Sobran's case, one post by a weblogger (even one that works for a conservative think tank) does not constitute a pattern of behavior on the part of the conservative establishment.

Okay, on to the issue of the relevance of [nomo|teleo]cracy. The title of the Sobran article is Dueling Teleocrats. More than half of the article focuses on explaining how conservatives have abandoned nomocracy and adopted a teleocratic view of government, which causes them to engage in the same questionable practices (litmus tests for Supreme Court justices is one that springs to mind) for which they often criticize "liberals". The Republicans are the "big government" party, too, they just emphasize different departments than the Democrats. The Right no longer has the moral high ground when it comes to issues of subverting the constitution and usurping unestablished power to accomplish their ends.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 2:28 AM

 
Insta-rection

Warning: This blog entry is narcissistically self-referential meta-blogging. Negativland would have a heyday. Oh, and there is a smutty blogosphere sniglet.

Okay, so we Monkeys were chattering about the insane traffic increase our site experienced when Instapundit linked to Brad's post on the Lileks smear campaign. Anyway, Brad sent us a SiteMeter graph containing the page views and visits we had experienced. Check it out.

The graph is remarkably phallic (at least to Dr. Freud and me) and I thought that the only reasonable term for this phenomenon would be "Insta-rection". Another traffic snapshot taken a few hours later only supports my interpretation. Given the (chronological) length of the event, I can only assume that Pfizer had something to do with this.

For more on the might and power of the Instapundit, check out this post on Jeff Jarvis's BuzzMachine.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 12:55 AM

 
One of the things I appreciate about this election is the frantic conniption the two major parties are having, being unable to ensure the winning candidate is one of their lackeys. Let any fool with $3500 and 65 gullible acquaintances get on the ballot, and you've got yourself a hootenanny! It won't take long for the RepubliCrats to change the rules on this - since the number of signatures required for recall is relatively low (compared to actually winning the election in the first place), it will only be a matter of time before disenfranchised independents and third-party supporters start using recall as a standard tactic to "cancel out" the two-party election and replace it with the recall free-for-all.

Arizona has it's own progressive democracy silliness - we've got initiative, referendum, and recall out here, too. But in our recall election process, there is only one ballot. If you gather enough signatures to trigger a recall election, the sitting office-holder appears on the ballot along-side all of the challengers. So a successful recall requires not just the initial signatures and a majority of voters who want the guy ousted, but a replacement candidate who can get more votes than the recall's subject.

I think if you're going to have recall, you have to go all the way like California. It's much more "Lord of the Flies."
posted by Monkey RobbL at 3:22 PM

 
I'd like to interrupt the Republican love-fest (just teasing - love on, I say) to praise King over at the St. Cloud State University Scholars blog. In response (not so much opposition, but not so much agreement, either) to Lileks's current bleat, he challenges the "lesser of evils" approach to voting, quoting liberally (or should I say, libertarian-ally) from this article by Leonard Reed at Liberty Haven.

This is important stuff - the idea being that voting for someone who's "not quite as bad" as the other schleps does more harm than good, because it encourages mush-mouthed opportunists who aren't committed to any principles to run for office. Whoever does the best job of avoiding a commitment to any idea that might offend a large constituency wins. The best candidate is the candidate that stands for nothing but "America" (or, in this case, California) without defining the term. This or that candidate is "tough on crime." What the hell does that mean? Are we talking Judge Roy Bean tough, or English Labour Party tough? Here's a link to the post.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 3:21 PM

 
I agree with Ben's post below. I'm not saying Davis won't use dirty tricks against Arnold, but he is not Simon. Mickey Kaus wonders if Arnold should have used "partner" to describe Maria, and Weintraub questions the bikini line line, but they miss the point: Arnold was inoculating himself against these kinds of attacks. As Ben points out, he is possibly the only candidate in the whole race who has the stature to decry dirty attacks (everyone else could be attacked by one candidate to the benefit of other candidates, but attacking the likeable Arnold makes everyone else look bad, whether they had a direct hand in it or not).

The problem is that Arnold may have underestimated how low political rhetoric has gotten. Slate magazine's increasingly erratic Tim Noah talks about Arnold's "Nazi problem." The key quote:

Clearly, though, that won't be enough. If Schwarzenegger doesn't renounce Waldheim in a highly public way, he can forget about ever becoming governor of California.

Oh, man. How out of touch can someone be? Yes, we also need to know what Arnold thinks of Reagan's visit to Bitburg, his view on the Teapot Dome scandal, and whether he feels the XYZ Affair reflects poorly on John Adams.

But just wait. It's all going to get dug up. And while they're throwing the dirt at Arnold, they won't notice how deep a hole they are digging for themselves. This is about the politics of disgust: we, the California voters, are disgusted by business as usual. The more they try to bury Arnold, the more he is an alternative.
posted by David at 11:39 PM

 
Blogger is blowing it. There is increasing instability, and disregard for problems. Ironically, they are being trashed in the BlogSphere they helped create. I'll write about this more later, but my immediate problem is that I can't track traffic to our site.

So, if you like what you see, drop us an e-mail at
infinitemonkeys at zebra.net.
Replace that "at" with a "@" of course.

If you don't like what you see, send us several e-mails. And if you're apathetic, send one anyway.

Update: I'm trying SiteMeter. I just added it, so don't laugh at our pathetically low numbers...
posted by David at 4:22 PM

 
Arnold is an Economics Nerd

When I was in college, I was a bit of a library nerd. I used to go to UCSD’s Central Library and browse the stacks, especially the economics section. I remember picking up a small, poorly bound book that was a collection of papers presented at a very academic, very technical symposium held in the early 1980's on the Austrian school of economics. That's not actually a school, but a group of thinkers who ushered in a new free market view of economics. On the first page was a small list of attendees at the conference, and there was Arnold Schwarzenegger's name.

This actually wasn't that surprising, and not just because Arnold's Austrian. He has an undergraduate degree in business and international economics, and was very rich before he ever became an actor (he invested the money he made in body building very shrewdly).

I may still have a lot of questions about Arnold, and I'm not sure if I'll vote for him. But I strongly disagree with those (such as Charles at Little Green Footballs) who claim that no one knows what he stands for.

In fact, I'll let Arnold respond to that, in a way, with this quote from Laissez Faire Book's web page selling Milton and Rose Friedman's "Free to Choose" videos:

Milton and Rose Friedman's Free to Choose TV series has changed my life.

I came from Austria, a socialistic country where government controlled the economy. A place where you can hear 18-year-old kids talking about their pensions. I wanted more. I wanted to be the best. I had to come to America. I had no money in my pocket, but here I had the freedom to get it. I have been able to parlay my muscles into a big movie career.

Okay, so there I was, waiting for Maria to get ready for a game of mixed doubles tennis. I started flipping the television dial. I caught a glimpse of Nobel Prize winning economist Milton Friedman whom I recognized from my studies in economics. I didn't know I was watching Free to Choose. It knocked me out. Dr. Friedman validated everything I ever thought about the way the economy works.

I became a big pain in the neck about Free to Choose. All my friends and acquaintances got tapes as well as books for Christmas after Christmas. If I had come up with Free to Choose, maybe I wouldn't have got into body building. --Arnold Schwarzenegger

(And, yes, that's Maria Shriver, whom he met in 1977 at a tennis tournament. And no, I don't really get that last sentence.)
posted by David at 1:28 AM

 
We Are All Individuals!

From the "oblivious to one's own irony" file, I thought I'd share something (sort of) funny about the progressive metal band Tool, who I have previously quoted in this weblog. Early in 2002, I purchased a package they released called Salival, which contained a DVD with the band's videos, plus a full-length CD of live, rare, and alternate tracks. The first track is a 15-minute promotion of drug use called "Third Eye", a live version of the song which closed their Ænema album. The studio version opens with a clip of dead comedian Sam Kineson (this is bonus irony, included at no additional charge) discussing how drugs have positively influenced western civilization. But the live version opens with an extended sermon by Timothy Leary, with certain phrases repeated, mantra-like, for emphasis. What were these phrases, you ask?

"Think for yourself. Question authority."
"Think for yourself. Question authority."
"Think for yourself. Question authority."

It goes on and on like this. "Hilarious!", I thought. "Brilliant!", I again said to myself. They've taken this lecture by Leary, and repeated the critical phrases over and over to show the irony of Leary "preaching" these "doctrines" to his "subjects", who have no grasp of the hypocrisy of someone "leading" a movement that rejects any concept of authority, and the utter nonsense of dictating the belief system that "thinking for yourself" inevitably (in their thinking) leads to. Genius!

Then I saw them perform.

Singer Maynard James Keenan's first interaction to the crowd was pretty much exactly the kind of speech you'd give to ignorant sheep who want to believe they're free-thinking enlightened gnostic insiders. Something to the effect of "We're all here to have fun. Not monster-truck rally kind of fun, but 'think for yourself, question authority' kind of fun. The kind of fun Republicans hate." Okay, fine. You've got an arena full of stoned kids, plus at least one shady looking guy in his mid-thirties who is almost certainly being looked at as, "the narc." It's certainly marginally better than saying "Hello Cleveland! We love your women!" But the choice of words he used to describe what kind of fun "we" were about to have sent fear through my heart. Could it be that they DIDN'T intend to be ironic on that record?

When they actually played "Third Eye", the audience's reaction confirmed my fears. They just didn't get it, and the band didn't want them to. A disappointment, to be sure.

Oh, and they didn't play my favorite songs off Ænema. And the sound sucked. And the opening act (Meshugga? Was that their name?) was positively awful. I'm talking about "Beavis and Butthead pretend to sing like Rob Zombie" awful.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 1:27 AM

 
Lileks is back, and he leads with the Arnie/Jessie issue:

If Arnold is the savior of California, I guess that means that Jesse Ventura was his John the Baptist. He was the first to show that large blunt men with muscle-centric showbiz careers could assume the governorship of a state - but that’s where the similarity ends.

Go read it now. Maybe if we all go at once, we can bring his server down again.
posted by David at 10:04 PM

 
Line from a review of a recent Camper Van Beethoven show, from the CamperVan-Etc group on Yahoo!:

This is like the craziest, most wonderful dream that doesn't end even when you know you have to get up and pee
posted by Monkey RobbL at 12:38 PM

 
8:00 p.m.

Tonight, I blog from paradise. It's been a long time since the last time I was here. Such a long, long time since [San Francisco-based purveyor of upscale cooking supplies] moved their data center up to some culture-forsaken suburb of Sacramento. But I'm back, and it's just the way I left it.

Current Song: "Beautiful Day" performed by U2

Current Drink: Powers Gold Label Irish Whiskey, on the rocks, with a glass of ice water

8:15 p.m.

The paradise I speak of is Fiddler's Green, my favorite Irish pub, and a place I inevitably wind up at just about every time I visit San Francisco. It's down on the Wharf, but doesn't have that cheesy, touristy sheen that most of the restaurants down here have. Sidebar: Seriously, WHY does In-N-Out Burger need to build a restaurant on Fisherman's Wharf? As my Aunt likes to say, "SF has more restaurants per capita than most any other city and probably the worst of the lot is better than most elsewhere (albeit expensive!)." [that's a direct quote from her e-mail]

Current Song: "Jailhouse Rock" performed by The Blues Brothers

Current Drink: Another Powers on the rocks

Current Meal: Ploughman's Mixed Grille

8:45 p.m.

Did I tell you about the Ploughman's? No? Well, let me tell you a little bit about the Mixed Grille. It starts with a pork chop, but that is just the beginning of this festival of unclean meats. Add to that two (three tonight) slices of Irish Bacon (kind of like Canadian bacon, but less laid back), two "bangers" (Irish pork sausages), black and white pudding (a sausage - I don't think either one of us wants to know what's in it), two eggs cooked to order, baked beans, grilled onions, a grilled tomato, and either mashed potatoes or "chips" (fries, as we all learned in "A Fish Called Wanda"). I'm enjoying my Ploughman's with chips and my eggs over medium.

Current Song: "Chain of Fools" performed by The Commitments

Current Drink: Nothing, while I'm waiting for one more Powers and another glass of ice water

I have this habit of spinning my glass of whiskey on the table or bar (table tonight - had to have room for my laptop), partly to chill the whiskey, and partly to have something to do with my hands. Both the bar and the tables are extremely conducive to this activity - the glass spins freely without sliding away. This is particularly important by the third glass, which I happen to be enjoying right now.

8:54 p.m.

Current Drink: Powers #3

Reggie Sanders is batting against his former teammates, the Giants. It's the top of the 7th inning, and Giants ace Jason Schmidt is shutting out the Pittsburgh Pirates 3-0. I have a love-hate relationship with the Giants. You see, before my beloved Diamondbacks were established, Phoenix was home to the Giants' AAA farm team, the Phoenix Giants. The Phoenix Giants eventually moved to Scottsdale (where the Giants have Spring Training), and finally became the Tucson Sidewinders, the AAA farm team for the Diamondbacks. So, before the D-Backs, we were pretty much obligated to root for the Giants, which wasn't difficult. But now that our home team is in the same division, and the Giants are leading the division by some 493 games, I feel like I SHOULD be rooting for the Pirates. This isn't difficult when that smug bastard Barry Bonds is at the plate, and it's certainly easier now that Dusty Baker's gone to the Cubs. But when I'm HERE, and someone like Schmidt is on the mound, it's awfully hard not to cheer when he strikes out another hapless victim.

9:05 p.m.

Current Song: "Mr. Jones" performed by Counting Crows

Current Drink: Same glass of Powers. I've been typing, and I need to slow down if I'm going to make it back to the hotel.

Ah, it's that time. Sometime after 9:00 p.m., in the corner of this tiny bar, a local troubadour sets up shop and plays cool songs on his acoustic guitar. Mostly Classic Rock, heavy on the Irish artists, of course, but it's definitely got its charm. Have I heard "Me and Julio Down By The Schoolyard" too many times? Not when this guy is singing it.

You've already gotten a sampling of what's on the jukebox before live entertainment starts. Lots of Irish artists, like The Pogues, U2, Van Morrison, The Cranberries, etc. And the expected classic rock selections, too. A few songs I'm fond of cueing up each time I wander in to Fiddler's: "Roadhouse Blues" by The Doors, "Family Snapshot" by Peter Gabriel, "Living In The Past" by Jethro Tull, "Brothers in Arms" by Dire Straits, and "Fat Bottomed Girls" by Queen. Right now, U2's "In God's Country" is playing (someone else's choice - I usually pick "Trip Through Your Wires"), and I'm thinking about how much I like what used to be called Side Two of The Joshua Tree, but is now just "the songs after 'Bullet The Blue Sky'".

I worked on my laptop during most of the flight over here, so my first battery is about to die. Better shut down and swap batteries. Some horrible Oasis song (is it called "Don't Look Back in Anger"?) just started on the jukebox. Even paradise has its warts.

9:17 p.m.

Okay, we're up with battery number two. Remind me next time we come here together to tell you about the last time I was here. It was back at the end of February, back when we were only threatening to invade a country that hadn't attacked us first (I think - first two glasses are kicking in), and I was hanging out here waiting for a recently reunited Camper Van Beethoven to be ready to take the stage up at Bimbo's 365 Club, just up the street a few blocks. Remind me to tell you about the incident with Gerard, who "loves me", if I'm going to take him at his word.

I'm not sure I've explained exactly what kind of charm this place holds for me. You see, it's right down here with all of the Ghirardelli-Cannery Row-Pier 39 tourist crap, but it's definitely a LOCAL bar. Frequently very busy, but not full of people who want to pay $7 for a pint of Budweiser in a cool glass. And the prices are incredible for the location: The Ploughman's Mixed Grille that I had for dinner? Only $9.75. I couldn't get that kind of meal that cheap in Tempe. And the Powers is a big factor - my favorite Irish Whiskey by far. But it's also the staff. The bartenders and wait staff all have Irish accents, and they're all friendly but not TOO friendly. I doubt any of them knows my name, and that's just as I would have it. Instead, the bartenders call me "lad" and the waitresses call me "love" (I think - maybe they're calling me "lad", too). Even when I haven't been here for 5-6 months, Johnny knows what I'm drinking, and has my glass of Powers poured before I even sit down.

And the food is fantastic. I know people make fun of food from all over the British Isles, but I really enjoy almost everything on the menu. The fish and chips are just the right kind of crispy, and the Shepherd's Pie is to die for. On Sunday they have delicious pot roast, and they also frequently serve a sirloin tip pie with a flaky pastry and fantastic brown gravy.

9:28 p.m.

Current Song: "High and Dry" performed by Local Acoustic Guitar Player (originally by Radiohead)

Current Drink: Magner's Hard Cider

I've moved on to Hard Cider. This means I'm considering leaving in the next hour or so. Not because I'm at all displeased with my surroundings, but simply because my belly is full, the game is almost over, and if you stay too long in one place, it stops being paradise and starts being just this pitiful bar where you park your pitiful ass every time you come in town because you're not creative enough to try one of San Francisco's 1001 other dining establishments. I don't want Fiddler's to become that - right now, I want my ashes to rest in an urn above the stone fireplace near the entrance.

My next step will be a pint of either Bass Ale or Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, depending on my mood. Right now, I feel like the right thing to drink would be the Bass. I know I should have a Guiness - it's an Irish Bar, after all, but I never had the stomach for stout. Give me a pale ale or ESB any day of the week.

Current Song "Lay Down Sally" performed by Fiddler's Troubadour

Current Drink: Same Magner's

My fellow bloggers are probably experiencing mixed feelings right now. On the one hand, they're wondering if I'll ever just shut up and go to sleep. On the other hand, they're feeling slightly grateful that I've only criticized the current administration once, and haven't once linked to an article that suggests that Abraham Lincoln was the Antichrist. Ooops!

And I'm talking about whiskey! That can't be all bad, can it? Even if I'm drinking the kind that has an "e" in the name, it's still wonderful, glorious, distilled liquor. Mmmmmm.

Current Song "Moondance" performed by "Johnny Smith", if our Troubadour is to be believed

Current Drink: STILL the same Magner's.

Score: Top of the 9th, 3-0 Giants. Looks like Schmidt and the Giants have another win under their belts.

Surely there are other Irish Pubs out there with the same charm as Fiddler's? I'm not so sure. In the bay, I've dined and drank at bars from the "Starry Plough" to the "Plough and Stars" (one of them's in Berkeley - hippies a-go-go), and none of them have the "frequented by locals, but visitors welcome" charm of Fiddler's. Back in Arizona, I certainly love Casey Moore's, but it ain't the same. And Rula Bula? Heresy! Seamus McCaffrey's is a nice place to get a drink, and Rosie's has some fine lunches, but it's still not the same.

FYI - Tim Worrell is in for the Giants. The previous pitcher (didn't catch his name - why won't those bastards put their names on their uniforms?) put two Pirates on base in the top of the 9th with no outs, and he's in to clean up the mess.

In San Diego, there's actually a nice pub in the Gaslamp Quarter, of all places. It's called "The Field", and I have to admit I was skeptical at first, chiefly because of the label "Authentic Irish Pub" above the door. Any place that calls itself "authentic" almost certainly is not. But I was surprised - again, all Irish staff and fine meals. I think I'll have to give it a firm second place. They don't have the Ploughman's, but they do have an Irish Breakfast that includes everything but the pork chop. Pretty good.

Worrell got out of the jam. He put another runner on board with one out, so the bases were loaded and the winning run was at the plate, but he managed to get the guy to hit into a double play that ended the game, so all's "well" that ends well.

9:53 p.m.

Current Song: "Fly Me To The Moon" by Troubadour "Smith"

Current Drink: Waiting for my pint of Bass Ale

Last time I caught a score, the Diamondbacks were beating the Expos 5-1 in the 3rd inning, but that was a LONG time ago. The Giants have secured their victory, and at this point it looks like our hopes of winning the division are slim to none, but we're still in the running for the National League wildcard spot. Only about 5 games behind the Phillies, last I checked. Hey, in last year's World Series, BOTH teams were the wildcard teams, so maybe we can still make something happen.

Scoring update - Arizona leads Montreal 8-5 in the top of the 9th, but the Phillies won their game, so it looks like today's going to be a wash for everyone.

10:12 p.m.

Geez, I miss this place. I used to come here every two-three weeks, and now I'm lucky if I get here 3 times a year. It's a shame. But that's the nature of the biz. I can't see myself moving here. The cost of living is simply outrageous, and when all is said and done, I love Arizona. Still, I often imagine, if I had the opportunity, I could move here for a year or two and get San Francisco "out of my system". But I fear all that would do is get SF "in" my system...

Current Song: "Blackbird" by our guitar-picking friend - oh, he just finished, now he's playing "Peaceful Easy Feeling"

Final Drink Count: 3 Powers Gold Label on the rocks, 1 pint Magners Hard Cider, 1 pint Bass Ale, 1 Ploughman's Mixed Grille, 1 ridiculously long weblog entry, 2 visits to the restroom.

Final Bill: $34.75 plus tip - not bad!
posted by Monkey RobbL at 10:49 PM

 
Ben brings up a good point. Forty percent of the monkeys on this blog are registered to vote in California. We have a strange game theory problem on this election, different then most. Before, it was easier to say that we should not "throw away" our vote on a third party candidate. But here, our votes are more powerful because:

a) It's not a binary choice.
B) Fewer people, I believe, will vote in this election than normally do. I might be wrong, since the gubernatorial elections are in the presidential off-years, but I think this election will only attract the hard-core voters on both sides.
c) It's going to take a fraction of the votes to win compared to previous years.

So on one hand, that's an argument for voting for who we truly believe in. But on the other, it suggests that we risk splitting our votes across too many choices, and letting a horror like Ariana take office.

I'm not sure what to believe. But I believe I'll have another Boodles and Vya martini...
posted by David at 9:23 PM

 
Mickey Kaus is dead on regarding Ariana's run for California governor. She's a very real threat. Yes, she has high negatives, but as Kaus has pointed out before, that doesn't matter in a race where a small plurality is needed to win. Ariana is a regular on KCRW's Left, Right and Center, which the L.A. radio station claims "reaches about 50,000 of the most influential radio listeners in Southern California." I'm one of those listeners, and Ariana is like nails on a chalkboard to me, but I bet I'm in the minority.

If public radio listeners and their fellow travelers go into the voting booth with Ariana as the only credible left-of-center choice, she could win easily.
posted by David at 5:55 PM

 
Philistine Bias at AP

The story Ben referenced in the previous post shows how biased toward Jack Daniels and other forms of Sour Mash the folks at the Associated Press are. I quote: "More than 95 percent of the world's bourbon is produced in Kentucky". My friend, 100% of the world's bourbon is produced in Kentucky. If it ain't from Kentucky, it ain't bourbon.
posted by Monkey RobbL at 10:43 AM

 
Joseph Sobran taught me a new word today. Actually, two new words, and they clarified some of my thoughts about government. Follow this link to both words (nomocracy and teleocracy), along with a bunch of other words that aren't quite so long, arranged in a sequence that is both readable and thought-provoking.

Here's the "money quote", as Brad likes to call it:

Conservative and libertarian philosophers sometimes distinguish two basic types of government. One is “nomocratic” government, or rule-based government, neutral as to ends; the other is “teleocratic” government, or government designed to achieve specific ends (abolishing poverty, say, or building empire).

The deepest Western political tradition is nomocracy; the modern state, however, has strongly inclined to teleocracy. One extreme form of teleocracy is communism, in which all laws and edicts of the state are subordinated to creating a certain kind of social order — “building a new society” is a common phrase for this sort of project.

And some "spare change":

Today, generally speaking, liberals and conservatives are both teleocratic in their politics. They merely have different and conflicting ends for the state to pursue. The liberal wants the state to achieve “social equality” of some sort; the conservative is more apt to urge “national security.” Either way, the result is a large role for government, with high taxes to support it.

The article itself is about the New York Times and claims of "liberal bias", but I found the "two new words" to be the most challenging and interesting.

Current Song: "This Is Crush Collision" from the album One Thousand Years Of Trouble by Age Of Chance

Current Drink: Powers Gold Label (on the rocks)
posted by Monkey RobbL at 10:09 PM

 
One of the odd things about Arnold Schwarzenegger's plan to announce whether he'll run for California governor is that the last people to know will be those in the West. The Tonight Show airs three hours earlier in the East, even though it's taped in Burbank.

But then, Arnold's priority isn't how California voters view him. It's how America's moviegoers view him. And that pretty much tells you what he's going to say.

The only really interesting question is whether he'll endorse Riordan, or even have Riordan appear on the show. Me, I'm going to TiVo it and go to bed.

posted by David at 3:43 PM

 
How I Spend My Summer Vacation

Hanging out with the crazy guys who built this roller coaster in the backyard. For our many readers who attend Burning Man, we'll be at 8:30 and Esplanade, running the coaster from about 8 pm until midnight Monday - Friday. For those who don't, that last sentence probably made little sense. But go to the coaster site and watch the cool videos anyway. If you do come by, ask for the carny bartender (that would be me).
posted by David at 12:36 AM